Academic Writing Sample Task 1 #65
You should spend about 20 minutes on this task.
The graph below shows radio and television audiences throughout the day in 1992.
Write a report for a university lecturer describing the information shown below.
Write at least 150 words.
Candidate answer 1
The graph shows the percentage of audiences over 4 yes old of UK follows the radio and television throughout the day during the period October-December 1992. It has been observed from the graph that less than 10% audiences follows the radio at 6:00 am and the percentage raised to a pick around 30% at 8′AM and decline gradually to around 10% during the period 2′00 to 4′00 Pm and again raised a bi t to around 12% between 4′00 to 6′00 PM. It then again dropped to below 10% at around 10′PM. The rate again raised to a bit between 10′00 PM to 12′00 PM and then dropped slowly by 4′00 AM. On the other hand, the rate of television audiences raises 0-10% during the period 6′00 to 8′00 am and remain steady up to 1 0′AM and then gradually goes down by 12′00 noon. The percentage raised dramatically to around 15% by 2′00 noon. The percentage raised dramatically goes down by 12′00 noon. The percentage raised dramatically to around 15% by 2′00 PM which again raised to a pick above 40% between 6′00-8′00 PM and then gradually dropped between the period 12′00 PM to 4′00 AM.
(197 words)
EXAMINER’S EXPLANATION
Band 6
“The answer has an appropriate introduction which the candidate has attempted
to express in his/her own words. There is good coverage of the data and
a brief reference to contrasting trends. The answer can be followed although
it is rather repetitive and cohesive devices are overused. In order to gain
a higher mark for content, the candidate would be expected to select the
salient features of the graph and comment primarily on these. Sentences
are long but lack complexity. There are some errors in tense, verb form
and spelling which interfere slightly with the flow of the answer.”
Candidate answer 2
The blue graph shows the television audiences throughout the day. It shows that the percentage of audiences is three percent in early morning but it gradually rises unto ten percent at 8:00 am and maintains the same for the next two hours. There is a slight fall in percentage in next two hours however after that it raises sharp unto twenty percent within the next two hours. After this the graph rises very fast and attains its peak at 10 pm which is about forty five percent. The graph gradually falls down and at 2:00 am it is at five percent. The red graph shows the percentage for radio audiences. Unlike the television one the peak percentage of the radio audiences is at 8:00 am which is about 30 percent. Then it gradually falls and it corresponds with the television one at two pm. After that it gradually falls but with a small increase in percentage at 4:30 to 6:00 pm. The percentage of audience then gradually goes down and at four AM it is the lowest which is near 2 percent. These graphs prove the progressive popularity of television.
(191 words)
EXAMINER’S EXPLANATION
Band 7
“The answer deals well with both the individual media trends and the overall
comparison of these trends. The opening could be more fully developed with
the inclusion of information relating to the groups studied and the period
of time during which the study took place. There is a good variety of cohesive
devices and the message can be followed quite easily although the expression
is sometimes a little clumsy. Structures are complex and vocabulary is varied
but there are errors in word forms, tense and voice though these do not
impede communication.”